What A Long Strange Trip… Or, Fucking Retirement Is Trying To Kill Me.

This post was originally published on 18 March, 2023, and moved here, to my new blog.

Well, it’s been a while. Sorry about that, but it turns out this retirement thing is a lot more work than I thought. I have written a bit about my TIA, so I won’t try to bore you further with that. I will say that Tam spent a good month staring at me like I was some kind of science experiment about to escape the confines of a petri dish. Luckily, that has gotten a bit better. She is actually trusting me to go kiting again, so I am taking that as a big step forward. So, What have we been doing with ourselves, and why is this retirement thing so difficult?

We left Bangkok finally! We met up with a friend there, who we ended up traveling with for a few weeks, but spending two weeks in Bangkok is way too much for anyone. It is noise, and pollution, and commotion, and noise, twenty-four hours a day. So we finally ran away to the south. We had a week or so in Cha Am and Hua Hin, which we really liked. They are about two and a half hours South of Bangkok by car, and it feels like a different world in such a short distance. This was the spot that Tam picked as a compromise (close enough to Bangkok in case my brain went weird again, but good place to kite), so we wanted to check it out.

We found this dog in Hua Hin, and shared our dinner with him. It’s hard to tell, but he is missing an eye, so I felt a real kinship with him after having my own eye go all wonky for a brief spell. He was a really sweet guy. All the dogs around here seem a bit aloof compared to the dogs in Vietnam. They are not as approachable, which is really difficult for me. I love dogs. I just want to give them scratches behind their fuzzy little ears and love them, but this may not be the safest practice here.(foreshadowing?)

In Hua Hin we found this completely deserted beach. It seems like this is a rarity here now. Twenty years ago, on previous visits, you could find secluded areas everywhere in Thailand. Not so much anymore. It is like finding a unicorn at Walmart now. This one was spectacular, about a mile long, flat soft sand beach, with crazy caves and rock formations to explore. Just us and our friend Mike.

Below Hua Hin, in Khao Tao, we found another monastery, really remote, and it had the biggest bull we had ever seen tied to a tiny little piece of rope. even the dogs were a little sketched out by this guy. 

Part of that same monastery, these awesome dragon/snake things.

A bit further South from Hua Hin by motorbike, we found another interesting spot, Khao Sam Roi Yot National Park (more on this later).

The park had what was probably the most stunning temple we have ever seen. It was old, and in the process of renovations, but sitting in the most breathtaking valley among limestone cliffs that challenge Yosemite for grandeur.

Then it was time to head to Koh Tao, an island that we had visited a few times before from eighteen to twenty years ago. It is still beautiful, but a bit crowded. While we were here, I managed to pick up a belly bug (or at least this is where it decided to express itself. Over and over and over). The first week wasn’t too terrible, just a bunch of trips to the bathroom. 

Then I met this guy on the beach. And he bit me. Through no fault of his own, I have to say. I approached him, and, as it turns out, he has cancer in his mouth and a broken leg. He was just letting me know he didn’t want company. But, it broke the skin, so off I went that night to start my rabies shots. Shit. We couldn’t skip the shots, because rabies is really prevalent in Thailand, even if there are no recorded cases on this island. We were also quite concerned at the time because he looked sickly, and was smacking his lips and foaming at the mouth (which, thankfully, turned out to be the cancer). 

Yup. Rabies shots. We did find a dog clinic the next day, and were informed of his health status, and that he was vaccinated for rabies, but, oh well, bring on the shots anyway. Rabies doesn’t seem like a really fun way to die.

It was just a few days later my belly decided it wasn’t getting enough attention, and went from a case of traveler’s diarrhea to full blown vomiting and bad poops. Probably the worst case I have ever had traveling. 

I felt like this guy.

It was okay, though, in the end. Koh Tao is a gorgeous place, and before I got sick we did do some stand-up paddling and swam a bunch. Tam still had me on lockdown anyway since I was finishing my Plavix (blood thinner), and she still wouldn’t really let me do anything fun. 

The sunsets were fantastic!

And these little guys were everywhere. I love these Tokay geckos, and the calls they make. Some get big. This one was about eight inches long.

One of the biggest problems I had was that I was super sick, but I had to get on a really rough ferry ride for 2 hours to Chumphon, to catch an overnight train from Chumphon to Bangkok, and I was only on day two of being sick. I took a bunch of Imodium, Dramamine, and Zofran, and went for it. It worked! I didn’t have to spend any time hugging the rather primitive and less than clean toilet on either the train or ferry!

I thought it might be really wise to follow this guy off the ferry after we made it to Chumphon. They make me feel at peace.

Getting on the plane in Bangkok to fly to Danang, Vietnam. I am never sure if I feel concerned that these two need to be putting oil in our jet engines before we go, or if I should feel relieved that now there is some oil in some place on the jet engine that might be important. 

We made it to Hoi An, Vietnam. We needed to do a visa run because our Thai visa was running out, and we were going to meet other friends in Hoi An for the lantern festival (again, more on this later). It was truly a boats/buses/trains/planes/automobiles adventure getting here. It was basically two days of transport, trying not to throw up or poop my shorts the whole way. 

And I really felt like this guy the whole way, and for the remainder of another week in Hoi An. I was really over being sick. We went to a clinic there, did a poop sample, and was given antibiotics and antifungals (strange that). We also went to an “Eastern medicine” doctor there, and he did a bunch of acupuncture and crazy voodoo stuff, and I walked out feeling a bunch better than when I went in. All in all, by the time we returned to Thailand, a couple of weeks later, I had lost twenty-two pounds. Tam was looking at me weird again.

We have finally made it back to Thailand!

We have rented a rough, but kinda cute studio apartment about eighty yards off the beach in Hoi An. It is directly behind the kite shop where we kite out of every day. We were so excited to find a place here where we could post up, kiteboard, and explore the area further. The best part is, we are paying three hundred and eighty-five dollars a month for this place. It’s perfect!

Tam found some really cute piglets at a petting zoo, in the back of a monastery, while they were having a carnival for the kids, and a crazy market with thumping electronic music for the adults. It was a really strange monastery.

The patio of our new apartment, and you can see the sea just past that tree. I can check the wind each morning from my patio while I have my coffee.

Simple place, but perfect for us!

 Now, if I can just get rid of this chest cold or COVID, whichever it is, that I picked up when we got back to Thailand, then I would be happy. This fucking retirement is trying to kill me.